Sunday, November 29, 2009

My journey to faith

I recently read a post by another blogger that insired me. She shared her testimony of how she came to the Lord. I enjoyed reading it very much and decided that I woud like to also share my conversion as well.
I was raised by Christian parents. We went to church most every Sunday. I was raised with good values and beliefs. But they were always my parents values and my parents beliefs. I, like so many children cared much more about what my friends thought and adopted most of there idea's and attitudes. After all I spent most of my time with them.
As a teenager I flirted with the line between what was and was not appropriate. Sometimes I put a toe over the line, but that was really it. I didnt get into any major trouble or cross what I considered to be any major lines.
Then my parents announced that they were getting a divorce. This was crushing to me. My parents had been married for almost twenty years and I had always viewed them as the perfect couple, I can look back now and see that I was blind to many issues in there marriage. Thats normal I think for a teenager. I can also see now how they are two much happier people apart then they ever were together.
I distinctly remember thinking that I had always been taught that our family's can be forever, eternal. I decided since mine wasnt that I didnt care anymore. I was going to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I dont in anway blame my parents for the choices I made. They were my sins and my mistakes, I just remember there divorce was a sort of trigger for my worst behavior. I used it as an excuse to do whatever I wanted.
That began the worst time in my life. I used boys and drinking as a way to get attention and also in a way to escape the feelings I had about my parents divorce.
I became pregnant at 16 almost 17 years old. . . I know that teen pregnancy is not a good thing. I understand now that the Lord would have us save ourselves for the companion He has chosen for us. I also believe that the Lord used my sins and my mistakes to bring me back to Him. When I became pregnant I suddenly had to look at my actions and behaviors and see where they would take me, I had to decide what I wanted for my child. At that moment I knew what I wanted was the Lord in our lives and the peace that I knew I could have if I put the Lords will first in my life. Thats when I started my journey back to church, back to the beliefs that had been my parents but now they were my beliefs. As I worked on developing a relationship with the Lord I gained my own testimony and I havent looked back since.
I love the Lord so much and am thankful daily for His foriveness . Thankful that He can take our weaknesses and our mistakes and use them to humble us and bring us back to Him.

1 comment:

Jenna said...

Praise the Lord that you turned back to Him! I can't begin to imagine how difficult a parents divorce would be...

Blessings to you, Sister:)