Friday, November 13, 2009

39 weeks and counting

I am 39 weeks and one day. Still not much progress toward getting this little girl out either! She seems very content to stay were she is and really can you blame her? I am a fabulous shelter for her =-}
I haven't posted anything on my blog lately although so much has been on my mind. I find my energy is just not what it usually is( wonder why haha) and so posting is one thing I don't get around to very often right now.
Mostly on my mind has just been the joy of having another blessing coming to our family.I am about to become the mother of four children and I couldn't be happier! I am getting used to the looks from others now. I walk into Walmart with two boys hanging onto the sides of the cart. A sweet little girl in the seat. Then people see my huge (yes huge) belly. I just have to laugh at some of there expressions =-} I also am usually, I'd say 95% of the time by myself since the love of my life is currently deployed.
The comments on the other hand have taken a bit more to get used to. Some have been very positive and kind. But those have not been the majority! Most are negative. No one has been out right mean But you can tell that some people definitely do not view all these children as a gift from God or as a blessing. Its sad really. I have had more joy and happiness and fulfilment as a mother than I could ever explain!
Something else that has been on my mind lately is my priorities. I have heard women so often say "my kids come first". I have also seen women devote all of there time and energy to there children. That doesn't sound like a bad thing does it? BUT we are not told in the scriptures to leave our Mothers and Fathers and cleave to our children are we? We are not told that our children are our leaders and heads of our home are we? When those children grow up and have families of their own then who will be there with us?
I have seen women exhaust them selves n the service of there children and have NOTHING left for their husband.The man who is by Gods design her life partner and eternal companion. This makes me so sad. I have seen couples get so wrapped up in other things that they don't bother to make time for each other.
I think this has been on my ind so much because my husband is away. When you have to go without your eternal companion you really get a chance to appreciate them more. My husband and I do not have a perfect marriage =-} Never will on this Earth since neither He nor I are perfect. BUT we have come such a long way in our eight years of marriage!
Some things we have learned have been very valuable to our marriage so I will share them.
First we always go to church together and read our scriptures together. Sharing our beliefs together and our time wit Gods word together is so beneficial to our marriage! We also make sure we have a date night at least once a month. Time together for just Him and I to enjoy each other. To be husband and wife and not mom and dad. I see so many couple neglecting making time to do this! They blow it off like its not a big deal, but I guarantee you it is hurting there marriage to do so! I see so many women think themselves a better mother (mother martyr) because they devote there time 100% to there kids.But doing that is neglecting there God given responsibility to be a good wife and companion.
The other thing that I have learned has really been all about Me! But it has probably been the thing that has improved my marriage the most. I can let my husband do things His way! Did you read that???? Do you believe me?? Well its true! I used to ask y husband to do things and then nag, and complain and belittle because He wasn't doing those things My way. I can tell you that caused a lot of resentment and bad feelings in my marriage. After our first deployment I think is when I had learned to just appreciate what my husband did for me. To appreciate it with no strings attached, with no grumbling. So what if he did things in a totally different way than I did, He was willing to help and willing to do them and that is really all that mattered! One of the amazing and wonderful side effects to me learning this was that my husband was happy to help out AND helped out more! Because He saw that He was being appreciated and wasn't being nagged about what he was doing and how he as doing it. I am just so thankful for the time I have to reflect on my life and my family and my marriage. Its so good to look at your life sometimes and see just how blessed you are!

1 comment:

Jenna said...

Being the 2nd oldest of eight (and I LOVE IT), I understand how it feels when you get those negative comments. There seems to be alot more of the negative than the positive.
Don't worry about them though, keep loving your children and welcoming what God gives you:) Children are so precious and such a joy...I guess some people don't understand the blessing of it?!

I've been thinking and praying about you and your little one that's on the way. Blessings for the delivery!!